Emotional Impermanence

Fri, 12/10/2012

Today we’re going to talk about one simple psychological principle that will make you understand women 100 times better than every guy you know.
Since the dawn of time, men have lamented the fact that “Women Are Not Logical!!!!”
Well I’m here to tell you today that women are logical. They do make sense. They just don’t use the same logic as you, because you are male. Women are not born with a man-brain, so you can’t expect them to follow man-logic.
99% of men out there fail to understand that women use a different system of logic. This leads men to make literally hundreds of mistakes per week when dealing with women. After making so many mistakes and so many miscalculations, most men end up frustrated and exasperated, yelling in their own head “Women Just Don’t Make Sense!”
For Pete’s sake! Stop assuming that women use “man-logic.” They don’t use it. They never have, and they never will.
Let me show you one simple way that woman-logic is different from man-logic. If you remember this principle, it will save you a lot of frustration and heartache.
NERD ALERT! I’m going to get geeky here for a minute.
When I was in college getting my Psychology degree, I took a class in Developmental Psychology aka Child Psychology. We learned all about the different stages of mental development that babies and children go through.
We learned about a concept called “Object Permanence.” Object permanence is the understanding that objects continue to exist even when they cannot be seen, heard, or touched.
In other words, an infant or small child may not realize that when his toy is not in his hand, it still exists somewhere else in the world. The child may cry when the toy is put away in the closet, because he thinks the toy will cease to exist. Then, eventually, the child’s brain matures to the point where he realizes that objects which are in his closet still exist, and will re-appear again in front of him at a later time. This is called “Object Permanence.”
So what does this have to do with woman-logic?
I’d like to introduce you to a concept called “Emotional Impermanence.”
In a woman’s brain, most emotions are temporary. Few emotions are permanent. Women’s emotions tend to be strong, extreme, and dramatic. Women base many of their decisions on strong, temporary emotions.
Women’s emotions are so strong, that they block out all previous emotions and ideas. A woman might feel a certain emotion on Thursday at 9pm, and from this emotion sprouts an idea and a plan.
Then, on Saturday at 4pm, a new emotion has occurred which is contrary to Thursday’s plan. It’s likely that Saturday’s emotion may be so strong, that a woman will not be able to hold both emotions simultaneously without experiencing extreme cognitive dissonance. Cognitive dissonance is an uncomfortable mental state, so this must be rectified. In order to return to a comfortable mental state, the woman will completely disregard Thursday’s emotion.
Now when I say “disregard,” I don’t just mean she changes her mind, I mean she decides that Thursday’s emotion NEVER EVEN EXISTED. It never happened. It’s erased from the record.
Im not saying all women are liars. I’m not saying they have low integrity. They simply cannot function in a constant state of cognitive and emotional dissonance, so the “erasure technique” is a coping mechanism women use to carry on through their daily life.
The mistake men make is that they assume women have the same understanding of emotional permanence as men do. For men, emotional permanence is more concrete. If a man feels a certain way about something on Tuesday, he probably still feels the same about it on Friday. Sure, we change our minds, but we don’t completely erase the previous emotions and ideas from our brain.
OK so this is all very theoretical. We’re going to have to take this to a practical level. Tune in to my next post and I’ll tell you what emotional impermanence means to you in your daily life.

Brad P.