I just wrapped up my nationwide summer coaching tour in
Houston Texas a few days ago.
What a blast!
Thanks to all you guys I met up with for coaching,
you’re the reason I do this.
There were a couple questions that came up over the last
month that mirror some of the questions guys on the
email list send in, so I want to spend some time in
today’s newsletter talking about those.
A big one is that guys want openers and techniques that
will open successfully 100% of the time.
There’s no such thing and if there were, you wouldn’t
Because for most guys, the search for that 100% open
rate is a sign of fear.
Women know you’re playing it safe, and they can smell
This is incredibly unattractive and one of the main
problems I see with guys who are having a hard time
For other guys, the dream of being “rejection proof” is
a sign of a huge ego. It’s not about a true interaction
with another person, it’s about you proving that you
have a perfect record and you can talk to ANY GIRL.
It’s almost like your trying to puff your chest out and
impress other dudes with what a “stud” you are.
That’s not good. It’s pretty self-centered and the girls
will know you’re not being genuine.
Look, there are all kinds of women out there…
..Some are compatible with you and some are NOT.
The goal of your opener should not be to get 100% of
girls to talk to you. The goal should be this:
To find out as quickly as possible whether this girl is
what you’re looking for.
You want to put her in a position to show her true
Your intention should be to screen girls and weed out
the incompatible ones as quickly as possible.
Here’s what I mean:
I push to get rejected FAST, instead of wasting 20
minutes on a go nowhere conversation.
Getting rejected gives me 20 minutes of my life back. A
lot can happen for me in 20 minutes. I can find a hotter
girl, maybe a 3some, maybe run into an old friend. You
Even if I sit there doing nothing, I’ll be plotting my
next move and that will still be better than the 20
minute of being bored with some bland girl who doesn’t
like me, yet doesn’t have the backbone to tell me to get
I know you’ve all had conversations like this:
It just won’t hook and you’re wanting to bail. The girl
is giving you NOTHING. She’s totally quiet. She’s
totally boring. You stand there and talk and get little
You ask her questions and she gives one-word answers.
Her friends are looking at you funny.
When that happens, the problem is not you, IT’S HER!
Some girls are super-boring.
Just weed them out and stay away from them!
Of course you can weed them out depending on what you’re
looking for. Some guys like more mellow girls and might
want to develop material that causes the high-energy
girls to not click with you.
For me personally, I screen for humor, intelligence, and
sexual energy in the first 30 seconds. If she’s lacking
any of those, I’m gone. I’m not wasting a few hours on a
girl who doesn’t know how to talk, laugh, and fuck. I’m
going to figure it out right away.
Look, if your purpose is to screen and evaluate the
girl, that is something women pick up on.
No matter what, it’s very attractive. It’s a different
motivation. You are not motivated by fear of
You are not motivated by ego or the need to prove that
you can open well.
Instead, you are motivated by the confident belief that
there are plenty women out there whom you would click
with, and it’s just a matter of feeling a few girls out
until you find one.
And that’s the type of guy women want to hook up with.
I spent the better part of the last month on the road
showing guys how powerful a shift like this can be and
it’s exactly what I teach in my Black Book Method.
Aside from the killer openers, attraction builders and
how to’s you’re going to get the all-important mindset,
which is the one thing that will make you TRULY
attractive to hot women.